Alas Otso

What do you do at 8 am?

When your work doesn’t start until 10 am, yet you found yourself in front of your office doorstep at 8 am, what then?

It’s a dilemma I cannot solve myself, as I sit here and kill time. I’m actually betting on sleep to catch up with me but the humid steamy air would make you think twice on what you’ll look like upon waking up. So no matter what happens, I must stay awake.

So why not just play around? The OT gym looks nice and inviting. On second thought, there are kids there with their therapists. There’s no knowing what they’d do or think when they catch me playing among them. I’ve learned long ago how some of these kids could surprise you.

So what now? I have been trying to text, email, chat and message people on all means available thinking that somehow or sometime one of them would respond. Today is no different.

I really don’t understand but maybe at this time and age, people, even students are overworked and busy. It’s as if they use their cell phones only when it’s important and needed. If that is the case, it might be the end of freedom of expression!!

Seriously though, my perception on the use of cellphones have changed through time. Gone were the days where you could simply text away until 3:00 in the morning or send text quotes and receive a gratified reply that would start a conversation. Flirting through text seemed to be near extinction, or so I hear.

The bottom line is that I have been texting almost everyone for almost an hour now only to be rewarded by silence. Maybe I’ll just look for something else to do.

I’m actually running out of option, and time is still as long as a few hours ago. It is as though it froze in its tracks and I am currently living in a slow motion world.

Why not try to write down what’s on my head? Truth be told, a release of one’s innermost thoughts is necessary to give way to new ideas and feelings. That way, you wont have the same feeling and thinking every few hours. I read about this somewhere, or maybe not (maybe it’s just some still small voice whispering in my head sometimes).

Anyway, I have my pen and my notebook in hand, but as much as I meditate, shout, or wound myself, no thoughts came. It has been like that since yesterday. My brain right now seemed like a viscous slurry you can’t use. In fact, I have written somethings yesterday but my mind went wandering that when I looked at what I was doing, I saw drawings of ancient men depicting the dangers of nuclear holocaust brought by the onslaught of the burger scarcity in the small town of the continent of Asia. WHATEVER THAT MEANS. Really though, my mind went wandering that far that I was forced to tear down that page from my notebook, the first of many yet to come in this new Chinese-construction-firm-inspired notebook.

After that, try as I might but no words came out of my head. Its as though someone drained it out of my head in record time. What easily came out were senseless ramblings, rants and muses that you or anyone else wouldn’t dare put on paper, blog, journal, SMS or even emails (Or so I thought).


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